eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
The most HILARIOUS part of being in Cursed Child fandom is that their standard for "dark and/or angsty fic" is adorably low.

That fic where a main character dies makes you sad? I came up Torchwood fandom. Our canon killed off more than half the main characters. Our happy AU fics were the ones where Ianto got a few more years with Jack and we all ignored the fact that Ianto would before dye and leave Jack to the inevitable despair and loneliness of infinite immortality.

Like, the reason I seem to crave some darkness is that it's so gosh-darn cotton-candy colored in this fandom ALL THE TIME. Hahahahaha.

(Notably, BTW, Harry Potter fandom as a distinct entity had a lot of dark fic going on because it had a lot of EVERYTHING. But that is a ponderance for another day.)
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
:D :D :D

So, I'm in a nerdy women's facebook group and one member just posted that she just watched the first episode of Torchwood. AND SHE IS NOT OK with the non-censentual mind-wiping of Gwen and Owen using the pheromone sex cologne. And then the user asked if the show was worth continuing.

AND THEN [livejournal.com profile] jossedintime TAGGED ME.


My stance on Torchwood has always been, "it's a terrible show, don't watch it, also I love it to pieces and will never let it go." And I have drifted a bit away from the fandom (although really I sort of drifted out of fandom for the last four years, and I'm just now crawling my way back, so...) but TORCHWOOD.

ONE PERSON COMMENTED THAT SHE SHOULD SKIP TO SEASON 3. I have declined to respond to that one. I basically gave the OP my ordinary anti-pitch and then told her that if she makes it to episode four, she should call me.

Then I offered to recommend good fic. :D :D

(And then I turned off notifications because I always disagree with everyone about Torchwood. Did I ever mention when I went to the movie theater screening of Season 4 and a woman told me she hated Ianto?)

Basically, I've been afraid to go back to Torchwood fandom because I'm afraid it's all going to be GONE. I know people have been fleeing livejournal and there's a lot of fic that wasn't posted anywhere else. And I'm going to KICK MYSELF if some of my favorite fics are gone. Thank goodness for AO3 getting in before the fandom totally died. I should...get on that.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Livejournal users are fleeing LJ to DW and I keep wanting to write a longer post about the issue and spend time pondering if I want to leave Livejournal or not but in my brain I am 100% PANICKING ABOUT THE TORCHWOOD FANFICTION.

Should I start downloading? Should I use evernote? Should I just save it in word so I can convert to .epub? What about the fic I've already not saved?????? Chasing down fic from my MASSIVE personal rec list is going to take forever!

eldabe: Dream lad, suprised.  (Dream Lad!)
This new Doctor Who spin-off looks like some kind of Torchwood-inspired high school AU.

I expect cameos from the all the Sarah Jane kids. And some tributes to Elisabeth Sladen.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Thing the first: It's Yuletide letter season, or that one time a year when people suddenly re-active their livejournals. It's been fun. I should get popcorn.

Thing the second: So, apparently, when I was younger and capable, I wrote this massive Torchwood meta essay. And then, like a complete fail, apparently failed to respond to any comments? Wondering if I should do that now. Because I'm creaking back into fandom life.

But I digress.

There are a few legitimate comments on that page. And then, and I don't think you can see them, there are SIX AND A HALF PAGES OF SPAM.

I get emails every few days with another spam post. And it's GROSS STUFF. Weird transphobic porn advertisements. CONSTANTLY. D:

I finally logged in to turn off anonymous commenting. Let's see if that stops it? I can turn off commenting altogether, but I hate doing that. I was also tempted to fix some horrific grammar mistakes but I resisted. Let it live in all its mistaken glory.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
More Ianto!

...crap, I have a fic I should actually try to finish before I listen to this.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)

I sort in the back of my mind new about the new Torchwood audio but I haven't been tracking them down or anything (and this is literally a bone-throw to the fans, we know it, we're not dumb, whatever.)



Life goals for after finals.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
That moment where you can't tell if there is actually more new fic being posted for due South than Torchwood or if it's just that more due South fic writers are finding AO3 and uploading their backlog.

*squints at internet*

Due South is so old that "homosexual sodomy" was still illegal in Texas when it ended. And yet. More fic.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Had a dream last night in which I hosted a get-together with two of my LJ friends and we were basically awesome and then one person left and the other one turned to me and went "but we never talked about Torchwood!"

So apparently my brain really wants to hang out with everyone, talking about Torchwood is a plus, not a necessity.


eldabe: Dream lad, suprised.  (Dream Lad!)




Torchwood radio plays maybe in the works but maybe not John Barrowman I love you but I don't trust you.

3-4 radio plays?

So, one will be total trash, one will be ok, and probably one will rip my heart out and crush it on the ground while I sob hysterically in class, if history is any predictor.

eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)

Um, warning for...actual cannibals in Wales?

eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Last week was just full of fandom references. Which was good and probably helped me SURVIVE. /1L

By fandom!

Inception: I got cold-called in Contracts for this case all about contract interpretation and whatnot and I slipped in the word “specificity” when arguing why the contract failed.

Ok, it’s a small reference. Unless you’re an Arthur/Eames shipper (which is what, 98% of the fandom?) in which case I basically flirted with my professor.

Torchwood: There is term in civil procedure called Long Arm Jurisdiction (actually super interesting because my CivPro professor is AWESOME) and every time he writes “LAS” on the board I’m get this pang of nostalgia for the last Last Author Standing and chatting with [livejournal.com profile] sariagray and active Torchwood fandom and it’s a lot of emotion for civil procedure, OK?

X-Men First Class: The librarians dug up a bunch of cool stuff from our archives so we could ooh and aaah when we got our library tour. One of the documents was handwritten meeting notes from the Kennedy administration taken DURING the Cuban Missile Crisis.

Ok, that one also counts for general history geekery.


eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
I have so much reading to do. So much.


Instead I had to make a post on tumblr to correct a potentially horrible Torchwood fandom misconception. (I HAVE SAM'S REC LIST HAHA!)

I even logged into tumblr because everyone deserves to read more Torchwood fanfic, especially lurking anons. I feel you, lurkers. I feel you.

And now for my next procrastination technique, grocery shopping!


Just noticed a grammar mistake on tumblr. Can you even edit tumblr posts? UGH TUMBLR WHY YOU.


ETA: Sam just thanked me on tumblr. Can I fangirl faint now or something? I did squee quietly but my new roommates don't know about fandom yet so shhhhhhh.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)

I switched back to the old style for now. Ugh LJ, stuff like this is going to kill off what little fandom social media activity I get.

2 - Trying to pick a name for my new laptop I am hopefully getting next month. Any suggestions? I love fandom names, and I rarely abandon a fandom, so I'm thinking about mushing any of my new sort-of-fandoms (X-Men, Inception) my big fandom of Torchwood, and any of my other various fandoms over the years -- check my tags or info page for more?

First suggestion: Ron Swansea. LOL. (WHAT I LIKE WALES OK?)

My current computer is named for the Vorkosigan saga, Batman, Animorphs and The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton, just to give you an idea. It's a long name. :D

3 - I've been poking my muse to try and write fic recently and I just have to say that I HOPE YOU ALL LIKE LAW SCHOOL AUS OF EVERYTHING FOREVER.

(Ianto would be SUCH a gunner. Gwen would be the public interest person earnestly trying to get into clinics as a 1L. Jack would spend every weekend sleeping around and drinking and not caring about his grades at all.)

4- So L. and I have been doing an X-Men movie rewatch (or, as I am starting to call it in my head, The Wolverine Diaries) as prep for when we get to see DoFP in a little over a week.

We've just come to a bit of an fork. On the one hand, First Class came out before "Wolverine In Japan," and I normally do my media in publication order by preference. On the other hand, the Wolverine movies are the least interesting to both of us and I want to save First Class for last as the lead-in to DoFP. Any thoughts/opinions?
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Somebody sicced a plot bunny on [livejournal.com profile] copperbadge and the result is a glorious Torchwood/Captain America fix-it kid!fic.

Everything is beautiful.

Well, except that it's on tumblr, one of the most atrocious platforms for fic ever. I'm clearly posting this on my own LJ for POSTERITY.


On a completely unrelated note, a friend brought over her copy of 1776 this past weekend and she and L and I all watched it.

It's a little long and occasionally slow for modern audiences but it is HILARIOUS. John Addams, if only we didn't all spend an hour pointing out to each other that in real life you were a slave owner. :( NOPE. YOU DIDN'T OWN SLAVES. A MILLION POINTS FOR YOU, ADDAMS FAMILY. :D Thanks for the correction, [livejournal.com profile] larsinger29!


/your heroes are fallible human beings
/good thing that was a theme in the movie
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
Torchwood/St. Trinian's crossover in which Mica is sent to a "posh girls school" with the money her Uncle Ianto left her and then proceeds to save the world from aliens with a team of unruly schoolgirls armed with hockey sticks.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
So, have you promos for this new show Resurrection? Dead people start mysteriously coming back to life and angst about it?

I saw a promo and all I could think was "I'm totally sure I've seen this plot done really well before. Why are they making another?"

And then I realized that I was just thinking about [livejournal.com profile] nancybrown's Straysverse. OOPS.

...Now I'm disappointed it's not a real TV show. I would be ALL OVER a television adaptation of the Most Depressing British Roadtrip Ever. The feels, man.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
I’m writing a later post, and I realized that I was getting really upset while writing it. And I wanted to backtrack and sort of examine where this was all coming from.

I think I’m going to start with John Green. I don’t always agree with him, but sometimes his words are just so right: “…nerds like us are allowed to be unironically enthusiastic about stuff… Nerds are allowed to love stuff, like jump-up-and-down-in-the-chair-can’t-control-yourself love it. Hank, when people call people nerds, mostly what they’re saying is ‘you like stuff.’ Which is just not a good insult at all. Like, ‘you are too enthusiastic about the miracle of human consciousness’.”

Fanndom is enmeshed in the unironic celebration of the human consciousness. Which is frequently wonderful and lots of fun. But it’s also very emotional, a lot of the time.

We joke about feels and devastation and loss in fandom. But we also sometimes admit that a particular character can pull us through a really hard time, or inspire us when we’re alone, or make us smile when nothing else will do it. We celebrate fictional birthdays and we help others because we’ve been inspired. These things affect us in our everyday lives.

Fandom is delicate.

And I think it’s delicate because it’s so emotional. Fandom, by and large, struggles to maintain respect for that emotional investment. We set up warning systems and ways to ensure that a person reading a fic or meta will know before going in if this is going to impact them emotionally. We try to provide emotional support for each other in all sorts of situations. Sometimes we fail – when a fandom is mean or uninviting, people might be turned off from it whatever their feelings on the source text. Fandoms can and have bullied people away. Sometimes people leave fandoms because they can’t handle it, and fandoms can kill a love for a character with other emotional stuff.

When a fandom is warm and fun, people might be drawn in regardless of the source text as well.

We tend to make fun of people who flounce from a fandom for certain reasons. We also understand when a person untangles themselves and walk away for other reasons. If you’re only watching a show for the rush of positive emotions you associate with a certain character, it’s ok if you walk away when that character is killed. It’s also ok for other people to stay.

When fandoms get into really horrible screaming matches, it’s sometimes hard to see the other side. But the other side is generally making these comments because it’s hitting them in the feels, as it were. Their reasons might be bad and their arguments might be awful, but I once argued that some of the (really bad) anti-Gwen people in Torchwood fandom were probably getting a lot of catharsis from other issues out through their ranting. I didn’t agree with them and I also felt bad for the other side of the equation, the people who adore Gwen and were really hurt that there were such vile things being said. I don’t think both sides ever reconciled so much as the hubbub died down with the fandom. (Warnings were my only real solution there. I didn’t read anything marked “anti-Gwen” but you bet I appreciated the heads-up.)

I just want to point out, I suppose, that these feelings are genuine. I’ve gotten to a point in my life where I can thankfully see something and say “nope” and walk away from it without consequences. I know what is going to make me sad or unhappy and when I should avoid it. In fandom, it’s been an important skill.

The worst, though, is when I’m really struggling with my feelings on a topic. Like when I can’t read fics about depression, because it’s too close to home. Or when I have to walk away from a fandom because it’s making me unhappy. Or when a fic writer writes something that just sours all of their fic for me. Maybe I shouldn’t be so sensitive?

Or maybe this is one of the dark sides to unironic enthusiasm. (I’ve seen much darker.) I have coping mechanisms in place and I handle it ok, and despite the crying jags that seemed to have hit a lot of people after COE, most people get by with some hyperbolic joking and moving on with life.

I dunno where I was going with this. Getting a post out a day means I don’t always have the time to really organize my thoughts. But I also don’t have the time to back out and never post.

Fandom is full of feelings, and I suppose I just wanted to acknowledge how fragile and thin the lines between the good and bad can be.
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
In Countrycide, Owen is sitting in the front seat next to Jack. Owen? Owen is A STICK. In my expert opinion as someone who still ends up in the backseat on family trips, Owen should have been in the backseat. Because there would have been more backseat room. Ianto probably should have been up front. (Even skinny S1 Ianto was more substantial than pencil!Owen.)

But Owen is clearly the WORST at road trips. Did you see him complain about the grass?

So, here's how it went down:

Jack: Driving!
Gwen: Not sitting next to Owen!
Tosh: Not sitting next to Owen!
Owen: Shotgun!
Ianto: *sits in the middle, doesn't waste time, WAS CLEARLY A YOUNGEST CHILD*


Personal note: This is a bit silly, but part of me wants to put posts like this on the meta community. Because I still want to put stuff there? And I'm not up to writing quality right now? /uncertain
eldabe: Image of canal in Venice (Default)
"We won't need rescuing. I haven't met a cell yet I couldn't get out of." - Tosh, Countrycide

Short Backstory )

But here's a fic I want to exist that I simply don't think I have the chops to write.

I want someone to write a fic about Tosh's emotional journey from after she's been kidnapped, blackmailed and then trapped in the UNIT cells through her "freedom" into Torchwood and specifically through Countrycide. Because I want Tosh to study Escapology. I want the story to have excerpts from the life of Harry Houdini, influences from Norman Bigelow, flavors from Michael Chabon's Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay. I want Tosh reading books, practicing on rope, handcuffs, straightjackets, watching Dorothy Deitrich shows. I want Tosh to practice at work and at home and I want no one noticing because this isn't a thing Tosh talks about, this is trying to fill the terrifying gap of Never Again. I want a flavor of magic in the story, because there's something magical about escape. And Tosh wants that confidence that she has in Coutrycide, even if it's fake. I want to read this story and feel like I learned something, because it's the story of Tosh learning.

I don't think I'm good enough at research to do this story justice. Also, I'm pretty sure my fairly straightforward writing style would be wrong for this story. But I think I about sometimes when I play the "I wish" game, and I think it's more-or-less what [livejournal.com profile] pocky_slash was asking about.

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